a feminising of the world

In the replies to yesterday's post, someone asked me how I would envision the feminising of the world. That's a big question, and I don't know if I'll be able to give a full answer. But I can share a few of my ideas, and I'd love to know what ideas you also might have on the topic.

By feminising the world I don't mean making it more woman-centric. I'm talking about feminine and masculine energies, and I know those terms are unhelpfully gendered. It would be better to use terms like active and passive, or change and holding. Also, I believe very strongly in the importance of balance, so I'm not wanting to do away with masculine energy at all.

I don't believe a capitalist society can allow a balance. In such a society, a person's only value is what they can do for the market, rather than how they are as a human being and how they create space for others to be themselves too. This is the fundamental purpose of feminine energy - to hold, to nourish, to be a safe and warm environment for comfort and growth. I believe we need to create or strengthen communities where it is encoded in our agreed manifesto, our government, our laws, that we take better care of each other. The most successful countries in the world have this. I also believe we need to stop educating our children for their future careers, rather than for the people they would like to be.

This is going to be a very long post if I continue in depth. So I'll just list ideas briefly ...

* Religion that sees both male & female as sacred and equal in the creation of life
* Natural energy instead of hacking into our mother earth
* No hunting of our sister and brother animals
* No factory farming
* Prioritising the health and care of children above profit
* Seeing unpaid work as just as noble & valuable as paid work
* Always someone in a family who is the full-time homemaker (man or woman)
* Networked communities, even someone employed to guide this work
* Restorative justice as much as possible instead of prison sentences
* Smaller schools integrated with adult spheres, apprenticeships, mentoring
* Community gardens, cities paved with wood & grass, fruiting trees, medicinal flowers
* Space for quiet and contemplation
* Community-based, nurturing models for healing illness, especially mental health
* More circles and warm colours and old things
* No loud thumping music in shops but a welcoming environment
* Stories that tell about relationships & are enriching rather than terrorising
* Natural toys for children, banning all plastics
* Reverence for the noble protector and the gentle warm-hearted caregiver
* Architecture that is not barren but enriches the physical & mental experience
* Architecture that embraces, warms, & that honours history as well as a contemporary vision
* Fewer junk food stores, more galleries and playgrounds
* Not equating softness and prettiness with weakness or lack of intellect
* Fashions that celebrate the diversity of bodies and spirits
* Language which holds men responsible for their crimes against women
* Kindness as the heart of our social education
* A return to good manners

You will see that my idea of a feminine world is one in which we embrace, nourish, and warm each other. It also honours and holds on to our histories while at the same time creating an environment which allows the future to grow. I believe it's hard to achieve this when we no longer have the home and community as our centre, but the work place (or school) instead. And when our stories, especially in the visual media - tv, movies, news - tend to be about destruction rather than making and strengthening bonds.

I could go on for hours, but instead will invite your thoughts in the combox if you want.


  1. Oh you've sparked so many thoughts in me, Sarah! First of all, can I say I SO want to live in your world!! Second, with your fem/masc balance - my immediate thought was 'active holding' (something I've been pondering for a while but never realizing how balancing it was of yin/yang energy...) Third, I feel I've found a lot of the things you describe in this village - partly because the church is the centre and many male and female energies are in place with both male and female clergy, male and female church wardens, times when action is the focus (working parties to collect litter, tidy village playground, etc), others when nurture is (coffee mornings, visiting the sick, etc). Of course it's not perfect (a group of humans can never be), but I sense folk know the community is real and important, and they honestly look out for each other. It really is a blessing to be a part of it!
    Now I will stop.
    PS Except to say I am SO glad you are in the world xx

    1. Thank you, what a lovely comment, so kind :-)

  2. I couldn't be more agree... That's a beautiful and really true post, so clear... Your words are my words... and if you let me, i want to shared this post, in my blog... but i need to do a traduction, of course with the corresponding link and credits... my mail: lamaisonboop@gmail.com for contact Thanks! ♥ and so much love for you

    1. Thank you. I sent you an email.

  3. Sarah, I appreciate you taking the time to share your beautiful thoughts on this topic. Thank you! ♥ The world you have described is the one I have often imagined in my own heart. I have spent my adult life seeking to establish a small (although imperfect) version of it in my home with my family. The defining essence of this vision is *harmonious connection*--a respectful sense of wonder and care for people, animals, plants, and all of the elements that make up this planet.

    I dislike using gender terms to describe the dynamics involved because it draws distinctions that separate us further rather than bringing us together. Much of the time these distinctions have no real basis (for example, why do so many people think of cats as female and dogs as male???). The forces of war, profit, exploitation, class, rudeness, and discrimination don't strike me as male/female, or even active/holding. They are just evil--because they hurt and destroy and go against the forces of harmonious connection.

    A long, long time ago I read a book called the Continuum Concept by Jean Liedloff. The book described the author's experiences observing the Yequana natives of South America and their non-competitive, nearly utopian society. The Yequana raised their children quite differently from Western parents. In contrast, the Yequana children grew up to be well-adjusted, community-centered, fulfilled adults.

    For many years now, I have been concerned about the staggering rise of anti-depressant use, along with other mood altering substances (both prescribed and used recreationally), among all ages in the West. Yesterday, I read an interesting article that goes well with the topic we are discussing here: "The Likely Cause of Addiction Has Been Discovered, and It Is Not What You Think": http://www.huffingtonpost.com/johann-hari/the-real-cause-of-addicti_b_6506936.html?ncid=engmodushpmg00000004

    I love everything about your post, Sarah, your list, and especially your last paragraph.♥ Thank you for providing a space for us to talk about these things. (My apologies for the long comment!)

  4. mmmm, yes to all of that! i am glad that you mentioned capitalist society above; they are, in both origin and in current time, intrinsically inimical to balance. i think it will be necessary at some point for capitalist societies to reassess radically, because capitalism has been a profound agent of global AND domestic damage and injustice. i think we will need new (or new-old-ish) ways of thinking about economics: economics as a closed, self-sustaining system, rather than endless "growth". one of the hallmarks of "the feminine" is that it is cyclical and circular, not an arrow, not a limitless trajectory, not a line...

    i love the conversations here...